86 thoughts on “Do Unto Others…

  1. I’m specifically interest in this comment, “One source, even confirmed that they knew of multiple persons – men and women – whom Tullian regularly used to fight battles for him online.” Is cyber stalking (https://www.ipredator.co/cyberstalking/) and/or cyber bullying (https://www.ipredator.co/cyber-bullying/) involved? If so, these are criminal offenses and must be reported to the FBI Internet Crime division (https://www.ic3.gov) ASAP!

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    1. I wouldn’t say it would qualify under those.

      Basically, he didn’t want to “get his hands dirty.” He would follow people looking to expose his abuses, then use his “friends” to spread his carefully crafted lies and disinformation.

      Occasionally, he would have them directly attack online, but at best it would qualify as trolling.

      Thank you for providing those links though. It is important that people understand the severity of these things and report it.

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  2. It is true that he still has many defenders: I recently put a critical post on the Confessional Lutheran FB page when TT blogged about being depressed and suicidal (a precursor for an upcoming book, I assume). After a few days, and many comments, my post was taken down on the grounds that it was ad hominem, and that my criticism of TT’s ‘depression’ blog was upsetting fellow Lutherans who suffer from clinical depression. My post was mocking of TT, unfortunately (making fun of the designer cropped beard, open collar shirts, stone washed jeans), and I’m sorry for that. But I was astounded to find so many people jumping to his defense and denouncing me for identifying him as a narcissist. He is clearly a sociopathic narcissist. Such people must, must, must be exposed for the Church’s good. It is loving, not gossipy, to do so. In fact, it is a violation of the 8th commandment not to speak the truth about serial predators. Shame on any Christian leader who continues to make excuses for this severely personality-disordered guy. The proper response of Christians to people like TT (who claim to be penitent) is, “You’re forgiven. Completely forgiven. Okay? Now stop it. Just stop already. For the love of God, stop. Find a new career and don’t try to sell me another book about how God turned your murky river water into refreshing iced tea.” Blogging, public speaking, podcasting, small group leading, parachurches, website launches, book writing, etc. are all backdoor ways around being defrocked. Great report, Nate, and love to all who have fallen under TT’s abusive spell. P.S., the best and only effective response to a narcissist is T.E.D.–‘total emotional detachment.’ Go your merry way and do not engage on any level. It’s quite liberating. 🙂

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    1. Been there done that, even as a Lutheran who wants more Lutheran theology, and is sick of the watering down of Lutheranism with seeker sensitive claptrap, I left all those Lutheran groups because of that. It’s sickening.

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    2. You know what gets me is that these people basically tell us to deal with our OWN sin when we are being sinned against because our own sin is more crucial to us. As it was mentioned in the stories being told, this allows an abuser to get away with just about everything, because the victim is told that his/her sin is more of a problem than anything being done to them.

      It’s a totally fallacious argument that we can’t deal with gross sins against us just because we are sinners too.

      And yet, Tullian has no problem whining and complaining about perceived sins being done to him by his critics in the wake of his quite deliberate nuking of his family and church.

      Classic “straining at gnats and swallowing camels” stuff going on there.

      It totally negates the fact that the Christian victim’s sin is forgiven in Christ, too, so why is that person automatically told to worry about their own sin? Why is their own sin a bigger problem for them if their sin is covered?

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  3. Wow, this post and the comments have really opened my eyes. I attended CRPC for a while during the Tullian years, before I had to move away, and simply had no idea about the extent of this. I even bought the “his wife had an affair first, he was grieving and sought ‘comfort’ in a close friend” line. How naive of me. I am rarely wrong about people and caught off guard like this. Very sad indeed. A question to OP and the commenters: do you think that “GerhardFordeaneske” radical grace theology is a natural breeding ground for this sort of thing? The downplaying of the law, sin, discipleship and responsibility? What is the relation between these behaviors and this particular theological line of thought (espoused by others who have similarly been caught in adultery)?

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    1. To answer the question briefly, I am not particularly familiar with “Gerhard-Fordeaneske” but I do think, in general, that so-called “radical grace” theology tends to result in a sin-leveling theology which favors persons of power and gives them avenues to abuse the privileges and authority with which the church has vested them.

      If you follow the EzerUncaged podcast, I did an interview for them going through some of Tullian’s theology, and specifically a recent sermon, highlighting red flags.

      That should be released soon, so keep your eyes out.

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      1. definitely I would look into the Gerhard Forde radical Lutheranism/radical grace garbage. He does have a powerful way of looking at SOME things, but sanctification isn’t one of them. Lutherans especially get caught up in promoting Forde way too much.

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  4. Sadly, it is the same story repeated by another egocentric abuser. They use their position to once again to gain sympathy, support and glory from their “mistake'” while the ones they hurt are further alienated and destroyed by his supporters/fans. If the blinders were removed, and the veil lifted, his deceived follower’s sympathy could be swept away. Perhaps his victims would actually receive the support and healing they so urgently need and deserve.

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  5. Thank you for sharing, Anon. It’s not easy speaking out against abusive leaders for the very reasons you stated. The church, most always, supports the abuser, leaving the ones damaged alone in their confusion and pain. There are thousands of victims of clergy abuse, with similar stories. It seems these predators were cut from the same mold. Basically, they are narcissistic in personality hence the need to have someone boost their ego as you mentioned.

    If you’re interested, there are many survivor stories found at http://www.thehopeofsurvivors.com/survivors.php

    There is hope and I pray you find support and healing. God is more than able and willing to do so.

    Blessings to you!
    MJ

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  6. Mmm, this “pastor is a pervert, alright. He has the hormones of a 17-year-old, the skills of a 50-year-old pervert, the vanity of a 23-year-old, and the mentality of a 2-year-old.

    Let him be gone. For good.

    Thanks for this article; it can only help get rid of the likes of this pervert.

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  7. One thing I wonder as I read a lot about TT, how are his kids doing? We have obviously seen the oldest fly off the handle on Twitter in defense of his father, but I imagine the younger two have to be extremely grief-stricken.

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  8. I do not listen to Fighting For The Faith anymore, however, Chris Roseborough used to defend Tullian quite heavily…curious…with all the recent documentation, has Chris done anything? to discuss Tullian’s behavior? Considering how Chris does so for most other Evangelical leaders. And a side note, I had always liked Fighting For The Faith so I am not casting stones, but just curious for those in the know, whether Tullian has been exposed further by Chris and his gathering crowd.

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    1. Chris is trying to say he had no idea any of this was happening. Clearly he had his blindfold on. People back in September 2015 tried to suggest that he was letting his friendship cloud his judgement and he said “Have you ever thought that somebody who knows a lot more of the information surrounding a situation due to a friendship might actually have a better informed opinion that (sic) someone who does not know all the facts?”

      He wrote an article here (get it fast before he deletes it) in which he stressed his inside scoop, in June 2015 on his pirate christian dot com site entitled “My perspective on Tullian’s sin”

      On his wall now he is saying he hasn’t talked to TT since April. And I think he said that before that it was sporadic. So I guess the inside info is not so much there, as he claimed.

      Even so, no matter how you slice it, he is admitting to having been deceived by someone he considered a friend. How is that discernment working out for you Chris? The rest of us knew fake repentance when we saw it.
      Chris posted a message by Phil Johnson called “how to identify true repentance” when Mark Driscoll issued all kinds of fake apologies, and he for whatever reason detected that Driscoll’s repentance was fake. I guess it was easier because they weren’t buddies?

      (I couldn’t include the URL’s in here because it would not allow the comment. Nate – if you want to look them up and include them feel free)

      Maybe Chris should listen to it again.

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      1. Yes, Chris has publicly stated he is done with Tullian. He commented on the Spiritual Sounding Board comments threads to that effect. I have not seen anything official either on his blog or his Twitter feed, but I haven’t checked since early this afternoon.

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        1. I realize he said he is done with Tullian, but he is also claiming despite all the obvious signs, that he had no idea Tullian was not telling the truth. He also took the opportunity to continue to trash the people who were NOT deceived by Tullian. So I would advise you not to cut him too much slack. He and his buddies who promoted the narcissist are part of the problem.

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          1. Totally agree. I know some of those former supporters I have talked to who are genuinely repentant. I have never directly engaged Chris to my knowledge (though I engage a lot of people, so my memory could betray me here). But, Chris and I fall on the opposite side of a lot of things, so I don’t expect compliments from him anyway.

            Others have divested from Tullian while still taking backhanded swipes at me, comes with the territory.

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  9. Nate, I greatly appreciate you exposing the lies about Tullian. It’s been a hard truth for me to accept. The messages he preached at Coral Ridge greatly impacted me. What’s ironic is as a result of hearing Tullian’s messages, God called me out of an abusive relationship with my former pastor. Tullian preached the Gospel so well that I yearned for freedom from the sin I’d been entangled in with my former pastor, and I actually confessed to my own elders. That didn’t go so well. They didn’t see it as abuse and as a result they exposed me and the pastor to the whole church and our family had to leave town because I felt so ashamed. I still cling to the truth of what Tullian taught. I am convinced that God spoke through him despite his manipulation, however it’s been so confusing to me seeing especially in your blog that Tullian behaved with Lisa the same way my former pastor did with me. The church needs to understand what spiritual abuse is. There have been way too many innocent victims. The worst thing about it is how it isolates a victim from others because they don’t understand, and how it rips into our source of hope. The shame I’ve experienced as a result of this abuse has weighed heavy on me for the past two years. I’ve been in counseling every week since then, and my counselor says I still have a long way to go in healing.If there’s anyway to prevent this from happening, it needs to be done. The bloody mess spiritual abuse leaves behind is one of the most horrific things I’ve ever experienced.

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    1. liztienna: Google: ripoffreport.com (search box type in John Paul Jackson) on Tammy’s first lament, complaint is a list to report church abuse to if that helps*. Tell your story to J. Lee Grady who wrote “10 Lies the Church Tells Women” (based on former cult) and or William Lobdell who wrote “Losing my Religion” (anonymously if need because it’s horrific to come out of such and for me it was for my very life, so understand). Maybe contact: David Johnson/Jeff VanVonderan of “Subtle Power of Spiritual Abuse”, Maybe bring people together that have similar stories and do a book and name the perpetrator’s/abuser’s and expose to Christianity Today and Charisma. Contact Austin Miles of “Don’t Call Me Brother” maybe he’ll write another book of true stories of Pastoral/Church abuse in letters in response to this book in “Setting the Captives Free”.
      Look at Merry Bloch Jones titles of her books, where she took people’s stories and created wonderful books for us to read.
      *Church Abuse List (some of the pastor’s in the list are part of the problem but they need to know what’s going on in the church and I name them in articles); I’M SO DONE WITH ABUSE IN THE CHURCH regarding evil wolves, hirelings, false shepherds, snake oil salesmen. David Wilkerson used to take care of things when he was alive; be what he wrote in “Troublemakers in the Church” 1988/redone 6/2007=pdf file. Create a Blog like this for other survivors to tell their stories, it’s very healing. Read Comments of the following: We are all God’s children no matter what age: https://spiritualsoundingboard.com/2014/11/05/why-dont-young-people-go-to-church/. The most evil person ever met to date was a narcissistic, self-serving, very unhealed pastor that was consumed with self would have considered him extremely schizophrenic not to think of what he was doing to congregation because it was a business to him and NOT about people (had a woman leave the church and kill herself; so much was hidden). Einstein’s definition of evil was “void and without God” and so many of these evil men who are Pastor’s have the hitler/napoleon complex and we as people are NOT researching their backgrounds, foundations and their motives and agenda which is covered well in John Paul Jackson’s “Jezebel Spirit” CD/tape teaching (not his book) excellent listen. Collect books/resources on Church Abuse.
      Thanks Nate for doing this site!

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      1. Thank you for all of these great resources and your understanding. I appreciate your time in sharing them with me and I will check them out. God bless.

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  10. Thank you, Nate, for faithfully exposing Tullian on your blog. And thank you, Lisa, for speaking up about your experiences with him. It all rings so eerily and nauseatingly true to his character. He’s still at it. No change. If Tullian had ever once truly met with God in the past 18 months, my husband and family would be some of the many to have received a sincere and public confession and apology. Instead I read his ongoing verbal diarrhea and fake suicide attempts, and his lies about me in text format in this post.

    I was Tullian’s affair partner in May 2015 – the one he texted Lisa about in the screenshot here. I have not come forward to tell my story publicly. Tullian befriended my husband, stole over $12,000 of our money and counseled him to divorce me before we separated. I have not had “three previous affairs”. I had one years before. Tullian knew this. He also knew/ suspected that my husband was having an affair. He knew how vulnerable I was. I do not consider myself a victim as much as a survivor of pastoral sexual abuse. I am a sinner. I have truly repented and know and love the Lord more now than I ever did. I have never been “out for a fight” despite having been reached out to by lawyers assuring me Tullian should be brought to justice. I have two beautiful young children (both whom Tullian baptized) and I have everything to live for. This man’s words are from the pit of hell! He will say ANYTHING to anyone…he is incapable of sincerity. All who trust this man are utterly gulled.

    My family was truly taken advantage, lied to and abused by Tullian. We didn’t know him very well, but felt sorry for him and tried to help him as he played the victim after finding out about the affair. I saw from the inside what happened at Coral Ridge and who Tullian used and how he manipulated, trying to secure a large financial settlement for himself from the church while simultaneously pursuing a relationship with me, love-bombing me with promises of marriage and other such nonsense. There is much that I know he would hate to become public. So he made sure he assassinated my character locally and to all who might care. I was completely cut off, isolated and had no one to help me. The church was reeling. Former church “friends” feared for their jobs or believed the lies about me. Some followed and pandered after him but cut me off. He had sufficiently caused enough distrust and fear of opening up, that I alienated myself from even pursuing appropriate help.

    Like Lisa, Tullian knew my story and had scoped me out at church and online before making his calculated, patient and very deliberate approach. This approach started a few weeks PRIOR to the well known events of spring of 2015. The double entendres, the songs, the lies….subtle befriending by a man I was not physically attracted to though believed to be charming, a relaxed extrovert, and very sincere. I always chose to doubt myself over behavior I would not have trusted so easily had he not been my pastor. Tullian counseled me continually during our brief relationship. He played with my mind. I was extremely vulnerable at the time. When I stepped away, asking for space, he pursued heavily. He used theology, the gospel, anything he could. He lied outrageously to me about many things. I saw him reaching out to multiple women, mostly online…he had hierarchies and compared us to each other, trying to provoke jealousy. He made comments about previous relationships, mentioning names but fabricating and embellishing details. He commented on how easy it was for a man to take advantage of young mothers in the church. I had the opportunity to meet with his affair partner from the year before me. I remembered her name from his conversation, though she was hardly the “blazing red-headed master theologian” he had claimed her to be. He played us in the same way…we had very similar stories. We knew we weren’t his first rodeo.

    When people on blogs blame the abused, highlighting the sin of adultery, they do damage they don’t realize. They don’t understand what it is to be preened and how much self-blame the victim is already drowning in. I have been seeing a phycologist for the past year. Many of his victims I know well still have very raw wounds and ongoing issues. When people shout about grace for the abuser, they dont know how foolish they are. Tullian had an outpouring of love and support at every turn, regardless of his antics. I get it. I was his “Adrian” (he was Rocky by the way)….he “needed a woman who would stand by him regardless”…sounds so weak and utterly pathetic. I was, for a season. If you haven’t been there, you really cannot comprehend what the darkness of sociopathic manipulation is like. I’m very thankful for “the Sheep Lady” ….she has helped me immensely.

    Suffice to say that the Lord creates the ravager to destroy and puts a limit none can pass. I am thankful for His deliverance, and dealings with me and for His care and beauty demonstrated to me so intimately. He is the friend who sticks closer than a brother. He is there when the rest of the world walks out. He is humble and beautiful and His gospel is TRUE..for all who come to Him IN TRUTH He will in no way cast out. But He is to be feared, and those who hurt his flock will not escape His judgment. From personal experience, I can attest that it is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the Living God. His chastening for me was profoundly painful. I’m no man’s judge, though it takes only an ounce of biblical discernment to assess that Tullian was, and remains to this day, a wolf in the body of Christ.

    Tullian will continue making a fool of himself and garnering an audience doing so until God says enough. I pray He will come to a place of self-understanding and genuine repentance this side of eternity. Until then, please don’t lend him money or give him your cell number.

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    1. Thank you for your courage in speaking up. Your voice is so important here, and Tullian’s lies were so insanely transparent.

      In am sorry for the abuses you suffered, and for the ways you were further abuses by Tullian’s lies.

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      1. Thank you for sharing your story. I would be quick to forgive this man if I thought he actually repented. Good luck to his new wife. Maybe she’ll enjoy sharing him. Disgusting.
        I grew up at CRPC. I was so conflicted over voting for Tullian or not. Ultimately, I did vote for him. Then his trickery was becoming clear and the congregation had doubts. You should have heard how the MODERATOR at the congregational meeting wouldn’t let anyone say comments that were “negative” about Tullian. You couldn’t even say “he raised his voice at so-in-so.” The mod would say “warning, you can’t say that” and the person would ask “how else am I supposed to describe Tullian yelling at the choir” mod: “strike two! Please discontinue your use of negative language” I’m not joking.
        Anyway, I didn’t worship Dr Kennedy and I was fully aware the church (as all churches) was full of sinners saved by grace, but that meeting made me finally realize the situation was hopeless there. Fast forward to the news of his “sins” and I wasn’t surprised at all.

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    2. When I stepped away, asking for space, he pursued heavily.

      There is another thing I recognize. I have so been there, with the lying and the love bombing…I feel for you. Thank you for sharing.

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  11. I find the descriptions of his patterns of behaviour – and how he responded to push-backs – really insightful and helpful. Thank you both for sharing this.

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  12. As one of his blind defenders, I want to apologize to those I am sure that I offended in my quest to protect him and be the friend he needed. Sadly, I didn’t yet know the whole story. I do hope that Tullian will listen to his own sermons. The ones that tell us that although we are forgiven vertically, we owe it to those we have hurt to seek forgiveness. We cannot just move on and leave people in our wake.

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  13. Thank you for this great explanation of clergy abuse, Nate. As a survivor of clergy sexual abuse, my question for the church is, “If money was stolen by a leader, would you keep that person in that position and reinstate him a few months or even years down the road?” I don’t believe any church would allow a person to continue caring for their funds if they were stolen. Innocence stolen is infinitely more damaging than funds taken. Caring more about money than members’ souls is frightening and causes the church to lose its effectiveness as well as create an unsafe environment. And it demeans and nullifies the victim’s pain.

    Also, church leaders who knowingly reinstate abusive leaders are just as responsible when they abuse again. With knowledge comes great responsibility. TT is a typical predator that we hear about repeatedly from other survivors. There is never only one victim.

    Thank you for sharing this truth and I pray for his victims.

    Mary Jo Noworyta, Victim Support Coordinator
    The Hope of Survivors
    thehopeofsurvivors.com

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  14. Thank you for this great explanation of clergy abuse, Nate. As a survivor of clergy sexual abuse, my question for the church is, “If money was stolen by a leader, would you keep that person in that position and reinstate him a few months or even years down the road?” I don’t believe any church would allow a person to continue caring for their funds if they were stolen. Innocence stolen is infinitely more damaging than funds taken. Caring more about money than members’ souls is frightening and causes the church to lose its effectiveness as well as create an unsafe environment. And it demeans and nullifies the victim’s pain.

    Also, church leaders who knowingly reinstate abusive leaders are just as responsible when they abuse again. With knowledge comes great responsibility. TT is a typical predator that we hear about repeatedly from other survivors. There is never only one victim.

    Thank you for sharing this truth and I pray for his victims.

    Mary Jo Noworyta, Victim Support Coordinator
    The Hope of Survivors
    thehopeofsurvivors.com

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  15. “He even warned Lisa to be careful who she interacted with because Kim had people who spied on him for her.”

    Whoa. There really is a playbook for cheaters.

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    1. This really cracks me up because he kept touting how he was not going to hide from anyone least of all the public.

      That his wife should want to know what is going on in his life, imagine that! lol He is one sick freak.

      She tweeted the day before he married “staci” that “tomorrow will be hard… But God” — and yet TT has all along been saying they cannot reconcile. (because in 8 weeks after his first visible ‘fall’ she wasn’t begging to take him back? I don’t know!). It’s so demented. As far as we know she has never had an affair either, all we have his his accusation. I noticed that last year, and that the person who has been behaving the classiest in all this (at least publicly) has been Kim.

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  16. A key sentence from Lisa is that she had never had a pastor care personally about her. This is the factor these narcissist abusers instinctively know about victims. Having been in evangelical radio for a quarter century, I have seen this in church settings small and large. The profile of victims is usually the same. What angers me most is that this predator was not spotted for what he was before he created a new list of victims. Churches who run after “hotties” and cool pastor guys are the disgusting enablers of these devils. And that is exactly what they are. Devils who scatter the sheep of Christ’s flock and leave bleeding victims behind. God help the vulnerable. Pastors in this dark age are unlikely to.

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  17. There must be a predator pastor playbook, because my ex-pastor said and did some of the EXACT same things as Tullian did to Lisa. It is uncanny….almost like reading my own story. Like her, I escaped before it crossed the line, but much damage was already done. This man MUST be stopped. He is dangerous. Someone would have to be a fool to know even a tiny bit of the story and still support him. I hope this exposes him for good. Keep up the good work!!

    P.S. There is a ministry for women who have been abused by clergy – The Hope of Survivors. I received much support from them after I realized I had been abused. I highly recommend this ministry.

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    1. I too am sorry you were abused by your so-called “Pastor.” Our enemy has invaded the flock and sadly the apostle Paul predicted this would happen already in the book of Acts.

      By the way, Tullian’s own brother Boz/Basyle runs a similar group supporting those who have been abused by clergy – Godly Response to Abuse in the Christian Environment. They are so good at what they do. They totally understand. He and his brother Emmanuel are on the board. I often wondered how their relationship was as a result. I guess I need wonder no more.

      I had written to Boz a while ago long before this came out, asking how his brother’s sermons can possibly guard the flock against abuse, since they seem to make light of sin and tell us when we are sinned against or abused, our main problem is our own sin. Really? Yes I understand that even abuse victims have sin that needs dealing with, but this is just such a dangerous answer. His brief response told me that he noticed the problem too.

      TT has repeatedly preached about how the people that influenced him the most were (my paraphrase) people who let him get away with everything. When he was out conning people by playing fixed pool games, and generally doing all kinds of bad stuff (he suggests even illegal stuff) some godly friend of the family tried to tell him he needed to stop and get his act together. The derision in his voice toward this person STILL some 20 years later was shocking. But he talks fondly of his dad who knew he was forging checks from his dad’s checkbook, and let him continue to do so. Those are the kinds of people that he values, apparently. People he can use with impunity. Those are the people he can “run to.”

      He joked publicly about the out of wedlock conception of his grandson several times, including to a bunch of seminarians at Concordia St Louis in the middle of all this chaos just before his own affair came out (so, April 2015, – from the timing of this it sounds like it would have been after his wife’s affair – according to his later accusation). He said that the kid’s nickname would be “paybacks” (because this is how Gabe was conceived). And the seminarians chuckled. Horrifying.

      In that message he calls out favorably Daniel Price, his buddy, who is guilty of the same kind of thing. Price also appeared on a panel at Liberate 2015, with Chris Rosebrough and Rod Rosenbladt. Rosebrough was aware of all Price’s failings at the time but still appeared with him. I don’t know about Rosenbladt, i would hope he has more sense than that. But Rosebrough has proven to be willing to brush a ridiculous amount of sin under the rug if the sinner is someone he finds to be awesome and cool. If they are ‘pharisees’ like me he makes all manner of false accusation (his favorite is “bearing false witness” i.e. “breaking the 8th commandment”). But the condemnation from these former promoters toward their buddies who have preyed on the flock is pretty mild. At the same time they spend all their career online exposing other predators of the flock who apparently aren’t in their circle. Frankly it ought to be the other way around. They continually promote people outside of their circle who they find influential and who may agree on some doctrinal issues. But once that person proves to be a disaster, they clam up and claim they have no jurisdiction to say or do anything. And they must just hope people forget that they were dreadfully wrong about that person. Especially when people like me had been trying to warn them for several years that something was “off” in their teaching.

      And then there is Mockingbird, and Christ Hold Fast (Daniel Price is involved in that, along with another pastoral adulterer Chad Bird). They all kind of cross pollenate and use each other for networking purposes. But as I said, once one of them proves to be a cancer they just like to pretend it never happened. Very little if any public warning is given to mark and avoid the one they promoted. It’s all hushed up and made to go away.

      Boz and their sister Jerushah had said a few negative things on twitter in response to Paul Tripp’s terribly irresponsible article suggesting that TT’s divorce was something that just “had to be” but didn’t seem to put any blame on Tullian himself. One tweet in particular that I remember from Boz was that there is FAR more going on behind the scenes than Paul seems to know about and both Boz and Jerushah seemed to say they were quite disappointed in his article. I believe the article has since disappeared. Possibly the tweets did too. I am just so sick of this twisted dysfunctional soap opera (boz & jerushah excepted) that I don’t feel like going to look it all up again.

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      1. Mr Tripp’s article of August 26, 2015, about Tullian Tchividjian’s marriage being “irreparably broken,” is archived on the Wayback Machine. Because it mentions the six-month period of working on issues, it is very relevant to the time frame of Nate’s article. Here is a quote from Mr Tripp’s statement:

        “From the point of Tullian’s confession and repentance, he has been committed to dealing with the issues of his heart and to restoring his marriage. Much grace, counsel, thought, prayer and action has been invested over a six month period of time with the hope of healing the marriage, but sadly, there are times when the trust is so deeply broken and patterns so set in place that it seems best to recognize that brokenness, cry out for God’s grace, mourn, commit to forgiveness, rest in the truths of the gospel and with a grieved heart, move on.”

        https://web.archive.org/web/20150828235714/http://www.paultripp.com/articles/posts/tullian-tchividjian-divorce

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        1. Unfortunately 6 months is not accurate, Tullian filed for divorce after about 8 or 9 weeks after all this came out, right about when he was defrocked. He couldn’t have even begun to work on it by that point. It sounds to me as if this ‘grace’ oriented “pastor” T was giving no grace to the ones they offended, and demanded they jump right back into the relationship as if nothing has happened. When they wouldn’t or didn’t trust the quality of his repentance, then I guess divorce was his only answer.

          Considering he was fooling around with and grooming so many other women at the time who wouldn’t want to accept his ‘quality’ repentance act, I mean really! /sarcasm. A man can convince himself she doesn’t know for sure about those other women and so she should have no reason to disbelieve his repentance (and hence he will call her a legalist for her distrust), but she still knows when the repentance is not genuine. You can slap makeup on over the festering wounds but the smell is unmistakable. The one who is infected has become nose blind to his own putrescence.

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      2. Terriergal-
        I’m glad you are able to connect all these dots with all these different people, particularly those associated (even loosely) with the Lutheran Church-Missouri Synod. Their deeds need to be exposed for the sake of the faithful, and they should be marked and avoided.

        Liked by 2 people

      3. terrigal, great comment. I was a member of CRPC briefly in the early 80s but was not an attender during TT’s tenure (I did visit his New City church a few times, but couldn’t take his strident preaching voice) but from time to time would catch his CRPC radio program while driving. I heard that same sermon, where he clearly still resented and spoke disdainfully, even hatefully about the Godly family friend who exhorted him to repent…then praising the people enabled his continued sin. I thought to myself at the time, this man has not repented of that old life, he has no humility and I really wondered about his spiritual condition. I was not surprised by any of what came out, nor what has happened since he was exposed. I’m glad he was defrocked. I doubt he is actually regenerate, but rather, is an unsaved man. When he says, Lord, Lord, didn’t I preach in your name, didn’t I write books…you know the rest of the story. The CRPC elders who knew of his affairs years before but hid them, should be barred from holding church office and publically censured as scripture requires. They are the ones who need church discipline!

        Liked by 1 person

  18. My heart is grieved for Lisa and for all the others being shamefully used by this man and others in the “ministry” who are just like him. Thank you, Lisa, for pulling back the curtain to reveal the truth. It took a lot of courage. Betrayal of trust is so hard to get over. I pray God will comfort and encourage you and give you wisdom as he guides you through.

    Liked by 2 people

  19. His son Gabriel recently went after several of us on twitter too, it was so bizarre. I pray he isn’t shaping up to be like his dad. 😦

    Thank you for sharing this. Just from the public behavior of himself and his defenders I mostly already had this idea of what he was like. Really sad.

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Lisa,

    You are a brave woman. Thank you for speaking up.

    Remember: trusting is what healthy people do. Abusing trust is what sick, evil people do. Whatever shame you feel is Tullian’s to carry, not yours. I pray you heal quickly and that this unpleasant experience is soon far behind you.

    Sending love & strength.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Actually, I feel I was wrong to judge Mr. Tchividjian so quickly even if he is as bad as people say. Honestly, I have no idea and he hasn’t impacted my life except as a writer I used to read a devotional by from time to time and had a couple books gathering dust on my bookshelf and now as one fallen from grace. Today, I was listening to The Liberation Project (podcast hosted by Justin Stumvoll and Blair Reynolds) and author Wm Paul Young (The Shack, Eve) shared his testimony of almost ruining his marriage and childhood sexual abuse. Mr. Tchividjian may have been abused as a child and that could’ve influenced the predatory nature, not that it makes it right. So I pray for God’s grace on Him (Romans 2:4) to lead him into true repentance and for restoration of his marriage if possible. Have mercy, Lord.

      Like

  21. Thank you so much for pulling the curtain back on TT’s manipulations. His actions must be compared to his words so the world can see the truth. I honestly fear for his soul.

    Like

  22. Awesome post, Nate.
    Thank you, Lisa, for your honesty in telling your story. I am sure it was hard. I know it will help others who have been hurt by Tullian and others like him. You are a brave woman!

    Like

Thanks for taking the time to read and engage. I look forward to your feedback, I welcome any criticism. However, as my goal here is mutualy respectful, beneficial conversation, I only ask that we keep civility in mind with our words. Grace and Peace.

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